I am so sorry you and your son have to go through this. My son is in a california prison and here in California the prisons have a yard called the SNY yard(special needs yard) it is were all gang drop outs go any inmate that has special needs can go to this yard. Maybe your son could go to a SNY if they have them in your state prison system. I hope you can find some place safer for your son. I know there are a lot of co's who are worse criminals then the inmates they watch over.
neverforget
dear neverforget:this is martha(a mother waits) i was re reading some ot the letters we post and came across this one of yours again. do not know why i did not notice before your statement about being alive when your son is released. This is one of my big fears also--im 65 my son is 38 has 10 to 20.it is a huge concern.my boy says in every letter and at every visit...are you ok mom? take care of your self.it's not my going.for me.but i guess we as mothers are used to being the ones who help and put pieces together.to make things right an kiss boo-boos.once a mother always a mother.ever notice we mother everything our children our husbands our pets.i tell myself to go each day with what ever it is we (my son and i must face for that day)i wish you and your son well,our lives are forever changed,but since this has all come about,there are many many of us all clinging to the same life boat.iam comforted by the fact im not alone..but also sad to see so many mothers in pain.(a mother waits) martha
mother waiting for son to stand in kitchen,with fridge door open,,,to hear whats to eat mom?
Thank you martha ~for your comforting words you are so right about once a mom always a mom. Please keep intouch it is nice to have have someone to comunicate with that truely understands what i am going through. Nobody else in my family does although they try.
take good care martha
HI TAMMY,
I TOO HAVE A SON THAT IS 25YRS NOW, BUT HAS BEEN INCARCERATED SINCE 2006. FOR DRIVING A CAR WITHOUT OWNER CONSENT (GTA) AND THIS WAS THE FIRST TIME FOR MY SON TOO! MY LIFE TOTALLY CHANGED I FELT LIKE I HAD LOST MY BABY WHICH MY SON IS TO ME! JUST BE THERE FOR HIM , WRITE HIM, BELIEVE ME MY SON TELLS ME THAT IF IT WASNT FOR HIS MOMMA HIS TIME WOULD BEEN ALOT HARDER! AND MY SON WRITE ME ALOT, BUT HE IS WAITING TO GET SENT TO FIRE CAMP AT THIS TIME, BUT HE IS FINALLY COMMING HOME THIS YEAR 2008 !
HANG IN THERE MOMMA! YOUR SON WILL BE FINE!
JUST REMEMBER "GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO THOSE WHO WAIT" AND THEY DO.
MOMMA
hello neverforget: how have you been these past weeks that feel like a life-time....have you been able to visit your son? i get to visit two times a month,,sundays from noon till 2pm it goes far to fast. an sometimes he get a guard who likes to taunt the guys during strip search just to take up time and to see if they can get one of the guys to to loose it and be denined visit. our last visit took my son 45 min. of visit time. it is so very wrong that they can do this. where are you? and how far is it for you to see your son. keep me informed i care. we are all hurting together...seems know one cares but those of us left behind. JESUS CARES bye for now ( a mother waits
Hello Martha~ My son is at Pleasant Valley State prison in California. It takes me about 3 to 3 1/2 hours to get there the visiting days are every Friday, Sat and Sun i go once a month when i can afford it i go 2x. I am going to see him this Friday it is the best day to visit there is no line to get in and very few people in the visiting room. thank you for caring and it is nice talking with you keep in touch.
Sincerely
HELLO EVERYONE. TODAY IS MARTHA'S BIRTHDAY (A MOTHER WAITS). IF YOUR ON LINE TODAY REMEMBER THIS DEAR LADY. HAPPT BIRTHDAY MY DEAR FRIEND.
LOTS OF LOVE AND PRAYERS TAMMY
DANIEL'S MOM, TINA'S SISTER
Happy Birthday Martha!!!!
good for another momma,who loves her baby boy...glad to know he will be home soon in your arms again..these young men of ours...i wounder how forever changed they will be? i do know in my son's eyes there is a new saddness, and a look of pain i fear will never leave..the system sets these men up for failure,when they parole. everything they demand and require of them is much more diffucult,than the average person on the street. places to live,jobs to get,know hunting.know places where other felons may be---what are they to do check id? when they come home to us, mothers,wives,girlfriends, children ,family,friends. most friends have left,many family members fell by the way side also.but be sure they will make a lame brained excuse to appear at your door step to get in on the news of family member who was in lock-up first hand. so they in turn can go to work or where ever and be the voice of athority on the in's and outs of prison life. when are sons where little we could grab them up in our arms to shield them from hurts.how can we now shield these grown men?LOVE-LOVE-and more LOVE, ask know questions,listen when they do talk,thier hearts are scared,there will be things they may never mend from.things are not going to be the same(ever)they may even show anger,may direct that anger at us. thats ok, remember you are the one person in his life who truely knows him.and loves him with know conditions or rules.when he is over his outbursts, believe me the regret and shame in his eyes will be far worse than his prison time,he had know intention of lashing out at you . just let it calm down reassure him you understand .....give that baby-boy cookies and milk laugh and cry together,,(a mother waits) martha
It's a real heartbreaker for sure. None of us ever gave birth to our child feeling that they would end up in prison. Every night I close my eyes and pray that my boy is still breathing and safe. Every minute of every day he is in my thoughts. He struggled when he was out on parole. There was nothing he could do that was right. When he was working and doing well, they found a way to foul it up. Parole should be about rehabilitation and reentry into society. Parole should be about setting them up to succeed-not to fail! For every child in prison, there's a mother who's heart is broken.
My son have been on lock down since he was 20. Like others that I've read in the wrong place at the wrong (so they said). Since he already had a record, this time he was given 25 years that he has to serve at leeat 80-85% of in the state of Virginia. He had a state appointed lawyer whom did not worked his case properly. All the eviedences proving that he was some where else at the time was not submitted. We've been fighting his case with appeals after appeals with no success. He 30 years old now with 10 years on lock down. I feel for all the mothers out there that's feeling like just like self every night and day. I am located nearly 700 miles from my son and so I get to see him once a year maybe 2 times. I'm just blessed to say that he has not lost his focus or his spirit. He got his GED , is now taking classes to complete his second year of college, and has a job. Even though I would reather for him to be home with his family, I try to keep thing positive for his think so that he will be ready for this live that we out here calls "FREEDOM". Letting him know that freedom is not FREE. If our son or daughters dont' stay positive while they are on lock down then once they are realeast, about 80% of the time they will go right back there. Even at times it may be hard for us to supply funding for our child/children, we must treat them as a bill and make sure they are paid. Just letting them know that we are here for them, keeps them focus and I can not say enough about writing LETTERS. Letters really keep them connected to they families and the out side world. I thank you all for reading (listing) to what I have to say. I will keep you all and your child that's on lock down in my PRAYERS.
A long term hurting Mother.......Savannah, GA.
Savannah, we all feel your pan. We all have to stay strong for our children. That's why we're here.
Hello to all my friends. I will be off line for about a week or so. I am changing phone companies so that I can get collect calls and I'll have DSL. I have heard that some Texas prisons let the inmates make a 5 minute collect call every 6 months. I hope so. Keep us in your prayers.
Tammy Daniel's mom, Tina's sister
As a guy who has spent time in prison, I have been writing prisonblogs the last few years and currently have 7 prisonblogs where I try to talk about prison issues. I try to key in on parents with loved ones in prison because I can understand how you feel, being a son in prison.
There are hundreds and hundreds of questions that people ask me on my blog, from canteen, showers, visits, minimum and maximum sentences, Human resource classes and much more. I hope you get the help you need here; I kinda pop in rarely since I devote myself to the prisonblogs, but I do understand what you are going through. If you can find someone here to explain the details of what prison life is like, it can indeed empower you to feel better than you did the night before.
Nothing's going to change the fact that your loved one is in prison, but the idea is to encourage you to get through one more day. Each day you do gives you a little more confidence to help that son or daughter in prison. Hang in there.
I think several of us would love to hear some of your thoughts....can you post a few blogs in this forum?
T