There is a prison blog I wrote called, "What to wear to a visit" and to the novice it might have meant what to wear physically, but that was not what I meant.
I write prison blogs, and from time to time I get emails about issues like this, and I try to make it a point to let parents know that when you visit, you must be the strong one.
Now, I know parents are going to cry and stuff, but that's normal. But as an ex offender, let me tell you why this can be a problem. You don't see the other side of prison AFTER the visit. You don't see how broken your son or daughter is after the visit, and how they have almost no venue to gather themselves.
You do. You can go to church, you can call a friend, you can take a walk, watch a movie, go online, anything...inmates can't so they have to hold in this mountain of feelings after seeing someone they care about. Now...imagine this...they remember the LAST thing you do.
So if you are crying, it is the last thing they remember, and it hurts.
I know it is hard, but when you visit someone you love, the idea is to encourage one another,right, not to break down and cry. You have to give that person something positive to remember you by, so he can be encouraged to get through another day.
I could go on and on with this, but I will have to keep it short, my blogs are pretty long.
Best wishes guys, and be encouraged.